Indianapolis Colts 27 Jacksonville Jaguars 30
In the first battle of the “Who’s the Worst in the AFC South” battles on the day, Jacksonville held off a 21-point fourth quarter surge by the Colts to pull themselves one step out of the basement.
Carolina Panthers 33 Atlanta Falcons 48
The Super Bowl hangover continues for the Carolina Panthers and the “We’re Hanging 40 On You!” streak Atlanta started last week continues as well. Julio Jones racked up 300 receiving yards, a feat only done five times in NFL history.
Oakland Raiders 28 Baltimore Colts 27
Baltimore’s unbeaten season came to an end at the hands of Raider QB Derek Carr who only through for 199 yards, but nailed 4 touchdowns in that span.
Detroit Lions 14 Chicago Bears 17
Brian Hoyer had one of his “Look, I am a great quarterback” games as he led the Bears to two touchdowns which was was enough to help them beat the Lions who are still waiting for responses to the Help Wanted ads.
Tennessee Titans 20 Houston Texans 27
Part two of the “Who’s the Worst in the AFC South” started out with division leader Houston jumping out to a quick 14 point lead before both teams and the referee crew descended into a morass of mistakes that left everyone wondering what just happened on multiple occasions.
Buffalo Bills 16 New England Patriots 0
In what may be the luckiest day of his life, Rex Ryan sneaks in and out of Foxborough without waking the sleeping dragon. Ryan not only stole the ring, he made sure that when Tom Brady and company come to Buffalo later this season the Bills are in for a serious shellacking.
Seattle Seahawks 27 New York Jets 17
Someone forgot to tell Russell Wilson he was injured, as the pro bowl QB threw three touchdowns and led his team to a solid win on the other side of the country from 12th Manville, USA. The Jets are now 1-3 and wondering what Rex Ryan managed to pull off in Foxborough yesterday.
Cleveland Browns 20 Washington Redskins 31
The Browns managed to keep even with the Redskins up to half time, primarily on the strength of play from running back Isaiah Crowell. After the half, though, Cleveland coughed up the rock like it was a hairball, giving it back to Washington on three straight drives to continue their winless streak. It’s been almost a year since the Browns got a W and it may be more before they do.
Denver Broncos 27 Tampa Bay Buccaneers 7
It was hard to buy into the predictions that Tampa Bay would pull an upset yesterday. trevor Siemian went down and Paxton Lynch came in proving that it doesn’t matter who’s taking snaps for the Broncos, they’re going to find a way to win.
Los Angeles Rams 17 Arizona Cardinals 13
Just like the Houston Texans, this Arizona team had a lot of hype and promise in the off season but none of that has materialized so far for the Cardinals. The mistakes are many, as well as confusing and costly. For LA fans, though they couldn’t have asked for a better start to the first season in decades.
New Orleans Saints 35 San Diego Chargers 34
The Saints defense has given out 79 points in the last two games. Thankfully Drew Brees was able to lead his team on two scoring drives in the last five minutes of the game to take a win from the Chargers who sent him pack oh so long ago.
Dallas Cowboys 24 San Francisco 49ers 17
The Cowboys rode their rookie stars to three touchdowns as Ezekiel Elliot crossed the goal line twice and Dak Prescott threw for another which was enough to overcome Chip Kelly’s not-so-high-flying offense.
Kansas City Chiefs 14 Pittsburgh Steelers 43
Say what you will about Pittsburgh, but if the NFL ended today they’d be the greatest franchise in football history. After getting their tail handed to them by Philly last week, the Steelers did what champions do and responded by demolishing they next opponent. Unfortunately for Andy Reid and the Chiefs, they were that opponent.